| When Canada was chosen to host the 2010 Olympics people had questions. Believe it or not these questions about Canada were posted on an International Tourism Website. Obviously the answers are a joke; but the questions were really asked! | |
| Q: | I have never seen it warm on Canadian TV, so how do the plants grow? ( England ) |
| A. We import all plants fully grown and then just sit around and watch them die. | |
| Q: | Will I be able to see Polar Bears in the street? ( USA ) |
| A: | Depends on how much you've been drinking. |
| Q: | I want to walk from Vancouver to Toronto , can I follow the Railroad tracks? ( Sweden ) |
| A: | Sure, it's only Four thousand miles, take lots of water. |
| Q: | Is it safe to run around in the bushes in Canada ? ( Sweden ) |
| A: | So it's true what they say about Swedes. |
| Q: | Are there any ATM's (cash machines) in Canada ? Can you send me a list of them in Toronto ,Vancouver , Edmonton and Halifax ? ( England ) |
| A: | What did your last slave die from ? |
| Q: | Can you give me some information about hippo racing in Canada ? ( USA ) |
| A: | Africa is the big triangle shaped continent south of Europe . Canada is that big country to your North...oh forget it. Sure, the hippo racing is every Tuesday night in Calgary Come naked. |
| Q: | Which direction is North in Canada ? ( USA ) |
| A: | Face south and then turn 180 degrees Contact us when you get here and we'll send the rest of the directions. |
| Q: | Can I bring cutlery into Canada ? ( England ) |
| A: | Why? Just use your fingers like we do. |
| Q: | Can you send me the Vienna Boys' Choir schedule? ( USA ) |
| A: | Austria is that quaint little country bordering Germany, which is...oh forget it. Sure, the Vienna Boys Choir plays every Tuesday night in Vancouver and in Calgary, straight after the hippo races. Come naked. |
| Q: | Do you have perfume in Canada ? ( Germany ) |
| A: | No, we don't stink. |
| Q: | I have developed a new product that is the fountain of youth. Where can I sell it in Canada ? ( USA ) |
| A: | Anywhere significant numbers of Americans gather. |
| Q: | Can you tell me the regions in British Columbia where the female population is smaller than the male population? ( Italy ) |
| A: | Yes, gay nightclubs. |
| Q: | Do you celebrate Thanksgiving in Canada ? ( USA ) |
| A: | Only at Thanksgiving. |
| Q: | Are there supermarkets in Toronto and is milk available all year round? ( Germany ) |
| A: | No, we are a peaceful civilization of Vegan hunter/gathers. Milk is illegal. |
| Q: | I have a question about a famous animal in Canada , but I forget its name. It's a kind of big horse with horns. ( USA ) |
| A: | It's called a Moose. They are tall and very violent, eating the brains of anyone walking close to them. You can scare them off by spraying yourself with human urine before you go out walking. |
| Q: | Will I be able to speak English most places I go? ( USA ) |
| A: | Yes, but you will have to learn it first. |
I'm an indie writer, as well as a Sherlock fan (and I might as well admit to being a Cumberbitch). I also enjoy most things that are scifi/fantasy/horror/speculative. I haven't written any fanfic, just my own stuff, but I'm fascinated by the whole fandom thing and I want to study how stories turn into crack (someday I want my stories to be someone else's crack. I will have you my pretties). This blog will include Bright Shiny Objects that have caught my attention.
Ask me anything
May 31, 2012
May 31, 2012
Sleipnir
AKLHGFJKGAFKJHDFH
WHAT.
how I didn’t realize this earlier
Well now we know Loki was busy before this movie. He wasn’t new to mischief.
OH MY FUCKING GOD
o_O Y’all missed this? I was over there in the theater frantically pointing it out to my husband. ”LOOK LOOK! EIGHT LEGS! SLEIPNIR!”
(Source: mor-iarty, via wordsonbrokentongues)
May 31, 2012
May 31, 2012
“OMG HAI”
I love your stupid face.
May 31, 2012
May 31, 2012
(Source: humanitygb, via strucketh-by-hawkeyes-arrow)
May 31, 2012
May 31, 2012
You never know when you’re gonna need a passing resemblance to someone.
(Source: ptrparker, via brokenarrowsandmumbledthoughts)
May 31, 2012
”Hah! You really think you can win little brother?
I THINK NOT”
May 31, 2012
Maps, with every name translated, back through the local tongue, into English.
Suddenly both poetic and prosaic, at once.
this is fantastic.
I’m. Not sure how I feel about Ireland (and Wales and Scotland) being included in this. :/
ETA and it’s called ‘The Atlas of True Names’ oh dear :///
what the fuck blackpool
Definitely click the link. Mexico means Moon Navel, apparently. I will never not be able to think about Mexico now with thinking “Moon Navel”.
Where are you from? Moon Navel. I’m an Moon Naveller.
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“In three years of teaching, this is, by far, my favorite student error.”
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When Canada was chosen to host the 2010 Olympics people had questions. Believe it or not these questions about Canada were posted on an International Tourism Website. Obviously the answers are a joke; but the questions were really asked!... ...
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Sleipnir
AKLHGFJKGAFKJHDFH
WHAT.
how I didn’t realize this earlier
Well...
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I would never unfollow anyone for posting personal stuff. Tumblr is a place to get out your feelings not bottle them up inside and pretend like you...
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